When is the last time you laughed so hard you cried? I mean gasping for air, can’t talk, tears streaming down your face? Even 30 minutes later little flurries of giggles pour out. And you feel good. Even the next day you feel good, a smile glancing across your face in memory of the event.
Apparently, it is so few and far between that my family recalls those moments of me fondly and retells the stories as if worthy enough to hand down from generation to generation.
But that is changing, everywhere in my life. I’ve begun to notice how laughter is creeping back in, settling into a more permanent fixture. It certainly didn’t happen overnight. I love going to work now and engaging with my very pleasant co-workers. Sharing in funny stories of their personal lives or daily routine. The hum of a happy staff person engrossed in their work, is music to my ears. Back home I share in a laugh with my family from a clever comment or something funny that happened. It’s a great way to start the day.
If you are jealous right now, I get it, I would be too. It was not always like this, not for years, which is a long time to feel dead inside. A heavy fog had settled over “employment land” leaving it a barren landscape. Sadly, it just takes one person to cast that cancerous cloud. When that person leaves, it can take a really long time for people to feel safe again. In my personal life, unfulfilled dreams left me feeling bitter and resentful – and I didn’t know how to deal with that.
Recently I was thinking about how I feel so deeply when a sad event has occurred. I internalize it and feel that the only right and honorable thing I can do is to keep carrying on with the “grief torch.” That is probably why I try to watch as little news as possible, the ugliness seems to stick. With regret, I realized that time is passing me by and the wonderful little giddy moments – that I actually have control over – are nonexistent. I CAN laugh, I CAN dance, I CAN live in the moment.
Right now, unhappiness and conflict rocks my faith community, to the point of people leaving. I remember when this happened years before and I recall the words of my father-in-law, “We will still be here to carry on, long after others leave. This time will pass.” It’s often hard for us to see the horizon and that conflict is temporary.
You may think that it is the foolish that laugh, that celebrate… maybe it is the wise.
Planes, Trains, & Automobiles – laughing at their troubles